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wStuff You Don't Wanna Know But Are Reading Anyway |
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I dunno how you found this, but alas, here you are. So enjoy the frightening fruits of my troubled little brain.
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wSaturday, February 26, 2005 |
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feeling: arm is sore
listening to: nothing
I'm still alive.
Never seem to post here anymore... main reason being nothing's really going on. Or if it is I seem more prone to dump it in one of my other journals. I have, what, 8 now? And all exist to harbor different varieties of rantage... :P Well, except the BLOOD and translations blogs, which don't really count... so there's this blog for somewhat personal rants, Livejournal for more pointless and public rants, Blurty for private BLOOD rants, AIM subprofile journal for all-out angst, Diaryland with my one and only 100% private diary (most people would keep those in written form but I'm too lazy >.>), and the newest one at My Diary, which is currently just sort of... there. Really only made it so I could get email notification when certain other diaries are updated. >> <<
And the only thing I really have to report for today is that our house was without power for about 7 hours. Sun was starting to go down and it was just starting to get nice and cold when it was finally fixed. Slept through what I could of it, then spent the remainder being stir crazy. I even got up and did random para para for a while out of boredom. e.e Also got back into reading LOTR, which I haven't done in ages... left off somewhere in the middle of the first book. Yeah, I'm special.
Hmm... realized recently that I'm finally gaining weight again. Like visibly. *sigh* Was on a roll there... not that my reduction methods were anything I'd recommend, but... eh... guess I developed a slight ego in the middle of it all or something. Was almost able to actually like what I saw in the mirror there for a few months. Now it's just kinda... meh. Been worse, but been better too. Sooo now I'm initiating efforts to kinda watch my intake in hopes of not piling those 50 pounds back on... not that it's doing any good, cause I have no willpower, but hey. >.>
Anyway, in much happier news, Calla gets her computer back tomorrow. :D :D :D Assuming the guy fixing it doesn't find something else to add to it just for his own... jollies... *cough*
Ok, I've spent a good half hour staring at this text box tossing out whatever randomness came to my head just for the sake of actually having something to post. And now I shall go... um... do something that isn't this. I don't know what, but I'll figure it out. Maybe. We'll see. The night is young.
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dragged from Becky's stream of consciousness at 2/26/2005 01:20:00 AM
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wThursday, February 10, 2005 |
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feeling: tired
listening to: my cell's ringtone is stuck in my head >.>
Forced awake at 7:30 this morning so I could go with my parents to visit my grandma in the hospital. Not that I didn't want to go, but... that's like, the middle of my night. =___=
Whole point was that she was to have a heart catheterization at some point today, but they had a full schedule so she didn't have a scheduled time... was just on some sort of a will-call basis. But we went to support her because this was the test she (and some of us also) were afraid she wouldn't survive through. Apparently when they admitted her on Tuesday she literally felt on the verge of death... but apparently just being forced to lie around and rest helped, because my dad and uncle were talking about how she looked and sounded stronger this morning than she has in months.
Anyway, only minutes after we arrived, they came in and announced that they had an opening for her procedure, so they took her right to it. Edgy few hours for everyone as we awaited the outcome. Turns out she made it through just fine, and the results were not perfect, but better than everyone expected. They found three non-critical problems... 75% blockage in her circumflex artery (one of the three major arteries that lead out of the heart... I know this from dissecting that cat in EEOB class ><), excess pressure in the heart keeping it from relaxing as well as it should between beats, and pulmonary hypertension (I think they said hypertension...). All treatable with medicines. They decided to give her a chemical stress test tomorrow morning to see how big a factor the 75% blocked artery is in her labored breathing, then to keep her there a few extra days to make sure the new drugs they're switching her to will actually do their job. She should be home early next week.
I don't really understand why they were never able to diagnose these problems sooner... they seemed pretty convinced that the meds they'll give her for all this will pretty much clear her up, maybe even perk her up enough that she won't need to be hooked up to oxygen tanks 24/7 anymore. For years and years she's been suffering, and with one test they find the root(s) of the problem just like that? I mean, that's good, but... O.o
I suppose it's just because she's been resisting going to the hospital for as long as she possibly could. It took some pretty serious pneumonia and various other evils for her to let them admit her last time, 2 years ago, and this time she put it off until she literally felt like she was about to die. One of her excuses was that, again, she didn't think she was strong enough to handle the test they ran on her today. But the major reason she's been slowly dying is that spoiled brat cousin of mine. Since grandma got custody of her she's been coddling her senseless, and it got to the point where she just won't let the child grow up. She's sixteen and completely dependent on grandma. She can't be in the house alone for even a minute because she hears noises and gets scared. Grandma still has to ask her every other hour if she's used the bathroom recently, remind her to wash her hands when most people her age would do it by common sense, etc. When they gave her an upstairs bedroom to herself last year, they put a baby monitor in there so she could call grandma if she got scared, which meant grandma in her miserable condition had to climb up that flight of stairs, often many times a night, just to coddle her back to sleep. The kid is SIXTEEN.
So long story short, all this time grandma has been letting herself sit and slowly die rather than attempt to make herself better because she's been afraid her household, especially her precious granddaughter, would be unable to function without her there. So she'd rather stay at home through all this now and let her life end years or even months earlier than it would if she'd just go to the hospital for a few days and finally figure out how to fix things. Grandparents... *head implodes*
And I could go into yet another nice long rant about that little sixteen-going-on-nine brat, but I need to finish this week's corners. One line in Bacchus hates me. -.-
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dragged from Becky's stream of consciousness at 2/10/2005 09:17:00 PM
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wTuesday, February 08, 2005 |
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feeling: mm... yeah
listening to: some Noggin show
Ok, back to regular blog updating. >.> Haven't been putting much in here of late mostly so I could whore my and Calla's Ohayocon pictures longer. <.< *coughcoughlookienowahemcough*
Today my grandma was admitted into the hospital again so they can run more tests. She doesn't think she can handle any more tests. And she's probably right. Her health has been terrible for a long time, and since our demon spawn cousin and her mentally ten year old father came to live with her 5 years ago, she's been steadily deteriorating. She's already undergone just about every medical test known to man and been put on countless medications and treatment routines, but nothing helps. Not sure exactly what more they think they can do this time, except weaken her further. General concern seems to be that she might not return home this time... but who knows, she's made it this long...
Anyway, nephew is here again today because his dad wanted to borrow our computer to do his taxes. And if that brat EVER asks me to make him a mayo sandwich again, I'm going to stuff one bun half in his mouth, lather mayo on every last inch of exposed skin on his body, smash the other bun on top of his head, and say "there, I made you a mayo sandwich." Most spoiled three year old I have ever seen. He's already learned how to pound the nearest surface, say "Hmph!", and stomp off to his room to pout when he doesn't get his way. And the sad thing is, everyone else thinks all of this is cute.
*takes a breath*
Moving on... I was highly amused yesterday because, all day long, there was this beetle that kept crawling all over the outside of Phoenix's tank. Aaaaaallll day long. Those beetles are evil incarnate. But watching Phoenix chase that thing around and flare and wiggle and bark at it at regular intervals throughout the entire day was far more amusing than it should've been.
And on a final completely random subject, I had a really creepy dream last night. I was being hunted down by a... vampire? or werewolf... some kind of immortal creature of the night. Probably a werewolf, even though he looked human. Just cause he was completely psychotic and predatory and scary. Tracked me by scent and such. >< And the whole thing even took place in some huge, old-ish, very dark house. Brrr.
That's about all I've got for now... should work more on the 18 songs Kiwamu's having me translate... meant to do that last night but kinda didn't. >> <<
Oh, and thanks again to Adion. 29 was right and I got my prize. :3
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dragged from Becky's stream of consciousness at 2/08/2005 03:37:00 PM
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