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wMonday, July 20, 2009

feeling: ...
listening to nothing


I've come to a realization. There are people in this world who are generally good people, who are nice to most others around them and do good things for the people they care about and occasionally even for people they don't care about. But even nice people need to break out of the mold now and then, to crush a hapless soul for the sake of letting off steam. But if there is such a thing as karma, it doesn't come back to haunt them because the life they crushed was someone who made themselves an easy target anyway, so it's the target's own fault, not the instigator's. They can chew up that target's soul, laugh at its pain, and leave it to rot in the sun with no need to feel guilty, and then they're free to go on and find happiness of their own and have all their dreams come true, and feel at ease because they got all their life's frustrations out on that one target and will never need to destroy anyone else again.

Maybe this little epiphany was brought on by the dream I had last night of two huge, gorgeous stallions ganging up on a tiny newborn foal and literally eating it alive despite its screams of fear and pain. I dunno.

Ok, well, that's that. Time for lunch followed by an afternoon of mindless gaming.

(No, by the way, the above does not involve anyone who actually cares enough to read this blog. Just an observation.)

comment! (1)
dragged from Becky's stream of consciousness at 7/20/2009 12:03:00 PM


wThursday, July 09, 2009

feeling: fatigued
listening to: nothing


Tonight, something randomly made me realize that I am relatively young, and barring the onset of some horrible disease or whatever, I probably have another half a century or more of life ahead of me.

And then I thought, augh, that long?

Fortunately, thanks to my genetic makeup, the likelihood of that horrible disease (or collection thereof) setting in is considerably high, so maybe I'll get out of a few of those decades after all.

I often say I'm a walking contradiction in that I can be too lazy to sit down unmoving and stare at the pages of a book for a couple hours. Or too tired to sleep, or too preoccupied to think, etc. But the failure I curse most often is my cowardice. I'm too chicken to even take the coward's way out.

Wonder if the insomnia and headache will shut up and let me sleep yet?

comment! (2)
dragged from Becky's stream of consciousness at 7/09/2009 03:45:00 AM