Stuff You Don't Wanna Know But Are Reading Anyway

		wStuff You Don't Wanna Know But Are Reading Anyway
		I dunno how you found this, but alas, here you are. So enjoy the frightening fruits of my troubled little brain.

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wSunday, March 21, 2004

Desert Rose, why do you live alone?
If you are sad, I'll make you leave this life
Are you white, blue, or bloody red?
All I can see is drowning in cold grey sand

The winds of time, you knock me to the ground
I'm dying of thirst, I wanna run away
I don't know how to set me free to live
My mind cries out feeling pain

I've been roaming to find myself
How long have I been feeling endless hurt
Falling down, rain flows into my heart
In the pain, I'm waiting for you
Can't go back, no place to go back to
Life is lost, flowers fall
If it's all dreams, now wake me up
If it's all real, just kill me

I'm making the wall inside my heart
I don't wanna let my emotions get out
It scares me to look at the world
Don't wanna find myself lost in your eyes
I tried to drown my past in grey
I never wanna feel more pain
Run away from you without saying any words
What I don't wanna lose is love

Through my eyes time goes by like tears
My emotions losing the color of life
Kill my heart, release all my pain, I'm shouting out loud
Insanity takes hold of me

Turning away from the wall I can see nothing
The scream deep inside, reflecting another person in my heart
Calls me from within
All existence you see before you must be wiped out
Dream, reality, memories, and yourself...

I begin to lose control of myself
My lust is so blind, destroys my mind
Nobody can stop my turning to madness
No matter how you try to hold me in your heart
Why do you wanna raise these walls?
I don't know the meaning of hatred
My brain gets blown away hearing words of lies
I only want to hold your love

Stab the dolls of hate
Wash yourself with their blood
Drive into the raging current of time
Swing your murderous weapon into the belly, "the Earth"
Shout and start creating confusion
Shed your blood for pleasure
And what? For love? What am I supposed to do?...

I believe in the madness called now
Past and future prison my heart
Time is blind, but I wanna trace my love
On the walls of time, over pain in my heart
Art of life
Insane blade stabbing dreams
Try to break all truth now
But I can't heal this broken heart in pain
Cannot start to live, cannot end my life
Keep on crying

Close my eyes, time breathes, I can hear
All love and sadness melt in my heart
Dry my tears, wipe my bloody face
I wanna feel me living my life outside my walls

You can't draw a picture of yesterday
So you're painting your heart with your blood
You can't say no
Only turning the wheel of time with a rope around your neck
You build a wall of morality and take a deep breath from between the bricks
You make up imaginary enemies and are chased by them
You're trying to commit suicide
You're satisfied with your prologue
Now you're painting your first chapter black
You are putting the scraps of your life together
And trying to make an asylum for yourself
You're hitting a bell on the edge of the stage
And you are trying to kill me

I believe in the madness called now
Time goes flowing, breaking my heart
Wanna live, can't let my heart kill myself
Still, I haven't found what I'm looking for
Art of life
I try to stop myself
But my heart goes to destroy the truth
Tell me why, I want the meaning of my life
Do I try to live?
Do I try to love?
In my dream...

I'm breaking the wall inside my heart
I just wanna let my emotions get out
Nobody can stop, I'm running to freedom
No matter how you try to hold me in your world

Like a doll carried by the wall of time
I sacrificed the present moment for the future
I was in the chains of memory, half blinded
Losing my heart walking in a sea of dreams

Close my eyes, rose breathes, I can hear
All love and sadness melt in my heart
Dry my tears, wipe my bloody face
I wanna feel me living my life outside my mind

Dreams can make me mad
I can't leave my dream, I can't stop myself
Don't know what I am
What lies are truth?
What truths are lies?

I believe in the madness called now
Time goes flowing, breaking my heart
Wanna live, can't let my heart kill myself
Still, I haven't found what I'm looking for
Art of life
I try to stop myself
But my heart goes to destroy the truth
Tell me why, I want the meaning of my life
Do I try to live?
Do I try to love?

Art of life
An eternal bleeding heart
You never wanna breathe your last
Wanna live, can't let my heart kill myself
Still I'm feeling for
A rose is breathing love, in my life...

X Japan

Yoshiki, wait for me...

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dragged from Becky's stream of consciousness at 3/21/2004 02:09:00 AM

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