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feeling: many things
listening to: Malice Mizer - Eege
I think I feel a cold coming on. First one since December. I've NEVER made it that long without being sick one way or another. So I suppose I should be strangely satisfied...
And I think I'm gonna have to start looking into the band Schwarz Stein. Morgen played one of their songs during the debut of her visual kei radio show tonight, and I liked it. The vocalist reminded me of a cross between Fu-ki of BLOOD and Juka of Moi Dix Mois. Which is funny, because most people say Juka sounds like a clone of Gackt... and the rest say he sounds like the love child of Gackt and Klaha... *ahem* Anyway... yes. Need to look into Schwarz Stein.
More fun news... it appears a new costume has been added to my cosplay arsenal for the coming Ohayocon. I will be Kaede, I will be a random vampire... and now, I will also be Takeshi. The seduction master himself (see post below XD). And Calla will be Taichi. This is going to be the best convention ever. XD
Hmm... I guess I'm going to town with my parents tomorrow so I can finally get a stinking debit card. And so I can actually activate and use my bank account, because apparently they don't have my signature on file since it's been sitting there since I was born, so they need to watch me sign some paper so I can withdraw money and junk. Then I can buy a money order and send away for BLOOD stuff. And make my own Paypal account so I can raid eBay. And get a debit card so I can pay for my Ohayocon costume materials and stuff. That big check I got from my BuckID account is not going to last very long. >.>;; Of course, the plan was for me to have a job by, like, winter... but... anyone see that happening? Yeah, me either. I figured I'd just wait until I started getting cabin fever, which usually happens around early September every year... but no signs of its onset so far... so I'll probably have to start hunting whether I want to or not. I'm not ready for work yet. Any work. I don't know enough Japanese to get a job that uses it, but I know too much Japanese to get some generic job and let my diploma go to waste. I could take fifth year Japanese this coming year 2 days a week, but that would mean 1) paying for the class and 2) paying for 2 round trips to Columbus every week, which would kinda make me need a job even sooner. Vicious cycles. Ain't life grand?
That said... rant time. Turn back now, thou faint of stomach.
I'm really glad I became a BLOOD fan. I actually feel like I'm part of something, and like I matter, which is a feeling I've only had once before and lost before I even had a chance to enjoy it. But since I joined this fandom, not only have I found new friends who I actually share a lot of mutual trust with, but I've found a way to contribute to something I enjoy and make a difference, if even a small one. By that I mean my translations, for the slow out there. :P BLOOD's website's English corners are updated every week thanks to me, and all email newsletters Kiwamu sends out now are in both Japanese and English thanks to me, and the fandom has access to translations of almost all of BLOOD's songs, thanks partly to me. Not to mention the new ordering instructions, the vampire poem/Raison D'etre, and a few other things. I love doing it, I learn Japanese in the process, and I actually get to maintain direct contact with my favorite band. Which means I actually know what's going on with the band and am actually among the first to know about new things going on with them, and that I even get to make that information available to the rest of the fandom on a weekly basis (or more). Plus, I know about as much about this band - history, news, releases, member info, etc - as any other fan out there (excluding the ones who are actually on staff or something). Every other fandom I've been in, I always felt like the newbie, no matter how long I stuck around. Everyone knew twice as much as me or more. Not so with BLOOD. I don't have all the insider info that staff members and Japanese fans and Roxanne (:P) have, but for a "normal fan," I'm very up on what's going on. I love that feeling... knowing what's going on so I don't feel like an idiot, being a translator so I can make information and lyrics available to the rest of the fans... and I even know the band itself appreciates me. The other day Kiwamu emailed me saying "Thanks for always sending me the corners. I'm really happy that that i'm able to upload them every week." As opposed to before, when Lauren would only do her job about once in 3 weeks or so, and she didn't translate the newsletters, either. How many people out there can say their favorite band/artist knows them by name and face,and really appreciates them? Even confides in them? (yes, Kiwamu ranted at me again... this is becoming strangely regular... O_o) Anyway, I'm getting repetitive.
But I'd love this fandom even without any credit, inside information, or direct appreciation. Because the best part of all of this is that I've made friends. People who share my interest in BLOOD, who I can talk to about the band and its music and not feel left out or uncomfortable. We even like the same aspects of the band in a lot of cases. Example - Calla and I squee over fanservice together, while just about anyone else I might talk to would be freaked out by the fact that we're amused by it (of course me and Dumplin' do the same thing, but that's a given, and this rant is about new friends I met through BLOOD, not just the ones I've known and loved all my life, BLOOD or not ^^;;). That's just one example... and the great thing is that a lot of these friends actually live in Ohio, between me and Columbus even... so I can (and do) actually spend time with them. Most of the rest live in other states but I've met them and am almost sure to meet them again; there're only a slight few exceptions.
I don't know why exactly I became a BLOOD fan. Before Ohayocon '04 I only had slight interest in J-rock, and a lot of the visual kei universe actually disturbed me. Even when I heard that this real visual kei band, BLOOD, would be playing at Ohayocon, I wasn't expecting much. Only planned to attend their concert because it was Japanese music and I liked Japanese music (though most of that was J-pop at the time). But by the end of their set I was a hardcore fan, and history was in the making. I left the con and increased my J-rock/visual kei knowledge, interest, and collection by huge leaps and bounds... but BLOOD is still on top of my list. My life would be next to empty right now if I hadn't fallen for this band. I don't know what it was that put me in the mindset to be attracted to their music and style on that weekend, but whatever it was, I owe it my all. Because I'm actually happy again, and I have friends again, and I feel wanted again... all thanks to BLOOD.
And yeah... I don't really expect a lot of people to understand all this, since this is the one journal/blog I maintain (out of 5) that I don't think anyone in the BLOOD fandom reads. But I wanted to get that out. If no one read it or cared, oh well. At least Dumplin' did. And maybe next I'll be able to post something similar to this in my Livejournal or Blurty too, so that Calla, Suz, Roxanne, Kristin, Connie, and the other BLOOD fans who've made me feel welcome in this fandom will know too.
Ok... I got that out of my system. Segue to rant #2. 9_9
I want everyone who reads this and cares to know that I'm doing my best to stay down-to-earth and not get carried away with my roles in the fandom and in the band's progress. But I know I brag sometimes. Like now for instance. >_>;; But I've seen worse since I joined this fandom. I've seen people who enjoy even higher standing with BLOOD and their fandom than I do, who have ended up getting the idea that they're more important than all the other fans, and even that they're somehow responsible for the band's future and well-being. Which may actually be true in some cases, but not when it gets to the point where they think their points of view concerning the band are more important than those of the band themselves. Not when it gets to the point where they try to keep other fans from helping the band in any way possible. Being part of this fandom is not about status... it's about supporting BLOOD. My role as a translator does not mean my opinions have priority over those of Kiwamu, or of any other member or fan. I work for Kiwamu, not the other way around... and I know more than one person who has seemingly forgotten this arrangement. And I have seen the feelings of people I care about being hurt in ways I don't even like to think about, and I don't even want to entertain the possibility of ever doing that to anyone myself.
And that's why I ask you, dear reader, to make sure that I do not let my place in the BLOOD fandom get to my head. If I start to go on and on about the band or my translations or anything to that effect while I'm talking to you, making you feel the least bit annoyed or left out or hurt, stop me. Put me in my place. I don't want to turn into those people. I like where I stand right now - I feel no need to fly any higher or crawl any lower. Of course... flying higher would be nice :P... but I don't need to. I'll do what's asked of me, I'll do the best I can, and I'll remember who I answer to (BLOOD) and who answers to me (no one).
I should quit now while I'm ahead. I commend anyone who actually read all this. And I leave you with pictures of Takeshi so you can see the other cosplay I'll be doing. :3
Probably the best full-costume (or mostly) shot. Pretty simple, luckily for me. Shirt, pants, skirt-looking thing, wrap-around belt/sash/cumberbund thing, chains, armwarmers...
A repeat, but I love this picture. *__* And you can see the chains and funky armwarmers that somehow make him look... chibi.
I also get to be a complete dork! XD And I actually really like his shoes...
And just for fun... my two cosplays side by side. No, I will not be attempting this particular stunt.
This "stunt" with Kiwamu, however, is another story. >:)
As is this one with Taichi. ^^
And now I should sleep before my throat gets any worse.
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dragged from Becky's stream of consciousness at 8/28/2004 02:14:00 AM
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